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How To Break Through The Beliefs That Limit Your Potential

 

As a leader, do you find yourself frustrated, wondering why employees don't meet expectations, peers are slow to act, or pressure from your boss falls unfairly on your shoulders? It's easy to point a finger at others and double down on getting results. But have you ever considered that the problem might not be them—that it might be you?
 
“Your mindset may be the only thing standing between you and your potential. It’s time to break free from the beliefs that hold you back,” says Muriel M. Wilkins, author of the new book, Leadership Unblocked: Break Through The Beliefs That Limit Your Potential.
 
Through countless hours coaching executives over the past twenty years, Wilkins has pinpointed the biggest reason behind these common leadership challenges: hidden blockers. These unconscious beliefs can actively stall progress if leaders aren't aware of their existence, preventing them from seeing a situation clearly, solving problems effectively, and advancing their careers.
 
In the book, Wilkins reveals seven key beliefs that hold leaders back. They are:
 
I Need to be Involved.” The belief that you need to be part of every detail at every level. You have the reputation of being a micromanager.
 
I Need it Done Now.” The belief that you need to get results right away, no matter what.
 
"I Know I'm Right." The belief that you—and only you—know the answers to the problems at hand. You don’t listen well and have a habit of interrupting.
 
I Can’t Make a Mistake” The belief that your performance must be flawless, above reproach. Sometimes you slow down progress because you don’t take a stance or put a stake in the ground.
 
If I Can Do it, So Can You.” The belief that others’ performance must be like yours to be acceptable. You tend to blame others when something goes wrong.
 
I Can’t Say No.” The belief that you must say yes and step up to the plate when asked. You are a doer but not necessarily a leader.
 
"I Don't Belong Here." The belief that you don’t fit in where you are or at your level. You wait to be invited to participate rather than self-initiate. You don’t speak up at meetings unless asked to do so.
 
Combining illustrative and powerful coaching conversations and research from the fields of neuroscience, leadership, and adult development theory, Wilkins offers a self-coaching “Blocked to Unblocked” guide for identifying, unpacking, and breaking through these barriers.
 
“My hope is that Leadership Unblocked can function as your portable coach, a dependable and wise companion as you endeavor to become free of the blockers that are holding you back,” says Wilkins.
 
“Remember, though, hidden blockers are sneaky. Overcoming them will take time, effort, and discipline. But, if you follow the steps in the process to uncover your hidden blocker, unpack it, and unblock yourself from it, you’ll be able to recognize it the next time it rears its head,” adds Wilkins.
 
Also, “It’s not unusual to be affected by more than one hidden blocker at once. But I’ve found that It’s most beneficial to address one limiting belief at a time—namely, the primary blocker that’s currently standing in the way of your leadership goals,” states Wilkins.
 
By using the practical advice in this book, leaders and aspiring leaders alike can cultivate the mindset to achieve their goals and finally become the high-impact and visionary leaders they want to be.
 
Muriel M. Wilkins

Wilkins shares these additional insights with us:
 
Question: Of the seven hidden blockers, which one or two are most common among leaders and why is that?
 
Wilkins: Honestly, they’re all relatively equally common among leaders—that’s why I surfaced them as the top seven as these are the patterns I’ve seen most consistently in my coaching work with leaders. They come from beliefs and assumptions most leaders pick up along the way—things like “I know I’m right,” “I can’t make a mistake,” or “I need to be involved.”
 
The tricky part is those beliefs usually came from a good place. They were reinforced by past successes or by the pressure to perform. For a while, they work. But as you step into more complex roles, those same beliefs can start to get in the way. They’re rooted in universal challenges—wanting to stay in control, fearing failure, or feeling like you always have to prove yourself. That’s why I call them “hidden blockers.” They sneak in under the radar, but they’re incredibly common.
 
That said, two that many leaders resonate with are:
 
“I Can’t Make a Mistake.” This one shows up a lot because leaders often work in high-pressure environments where mistakes feel costly. The belief is that perfection equals credibility, so they overanalyze or hesitate to decide for fear of being wrong. That drive for perfection can lead to indecision, inefficiency, and burnout.
 
“I Need to Be Involved.” Leaders often feel they have to keep their hands on everything to ensure things go smoothly. That can lead to micromanagement and overcommitment, leaving little room for strategic thinking. Usually, it stems from times when being hands-on was rewarded, or from a fear of losing control.
 
Both blockers come from natural instincts to maintain control and avoid failure. But left unchecked, they limit growth, scalability, and the ability to empower teams. Recognizing them is the first step to breaking the pattern.
 
Question: Why is it important for readers to use the Coach Yourself Worksheet after reading the book?
 
Wilkins: Because reading the book gives you insight, but the worksheet helps you put it into practice. Awareness by itself doesn’t create change—you have to pause, reflect, and figure out what this means for you. The worksheet gives you a simple structure to do exactly that.
 
It’s designed to help you identify your specific blockers, unpack where they came from, and start reframing them into beliefs that actually support the kind of leader you want to be. It’s like taking the “aha moment” from the book and turning it into a plan you can actually work with.
 
That way, you’re not just nodding along with the concepts—you’re actively engaging with them, uncovering limiting beliefs, and taking deliberate steps to grow. And that’s what makes the lessons stick and lead to real, sustainable change.
 
Question: What are a few steps a leader can take to help employees start to identify (and ultimately unblock) their hidden blockers?
 
Wilkins: A big one is feedback—sharing what you notice about the gap between someone’s intent and their actual impact. That often creates the “aha” moment where they realize, I might be stuck here.
 
From there, it’s about asking curiosity-driven questions like, “What assumptions might be influencing you?” or “Where do you think that belief comes from?” That reflection helps people uncover the deeper patterns.
 
Then, you can support them in reframing—shifting toward a belief that actually helps them get the results they want—and encourage them to try small, concrete actions to practice that new mindset. Done consistently, those steps build self-awareness and spark real growth on a team.
___
 
Wilkins, founder and CEO of Paravis Partners, is a sought-after C-suite adviser and executive coach with a twenty-year track record of helping senior leaders take their performance to the next level.
 
She has served clients across a number of industries including management consulting, private equity, biotech, financial services, retail, and non-profits.
 
She is the coauthor of Own the Room: Discover Your Signature Voice to Master Your Leadership Presence. She is algo the host of the award-winning Harvard Business Review podcast, Coaching Real Leaders. She holds an MBA from Harvard Business School, an undergraduate degree from Georgetown University, and a leadership coaching certification from Georgetown University.
 
Thank you to the book’s publisher for sending me an advance copy of the book.

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