“Helping others is a good thing, but even the most well-intentioned attempts can be undermined by a simple truth: We almost always focus on “fixing” people – correcting problems or filling the gaps between where they are and where we think they should be. Unfortunately, this doesn’t inspire sustained learning or positive change. Even when people do respond, they often do so out of obligation rather than motivation,” explain the authors of the book, Helping People Change: Coaching With Compassion For Lifelong Learning And Growth . The authors, Richard Boyatzis , Melvin Smith and Ellen Van Oosten , teach that the most effective way to help people learn and change is to connect to a positive vision of themselves, or to an inspiring dream they’ve long held. Having a personal vision is one of the most powerful ways to engage neurologically and emotionally. Plus, great coaches know that people draw energy from their visions and dreams, and that same energy sustains their efforts to chan
These eight decision-making tactics from David Lahey ’s book, Predicting Success , are helpful to me and hopefully useful to you as well: Deep breathing , to clear your mind. Researching , to feel confident that you have all the information in front of you. Listing your options , in either verbal or written form, to keep the whole picture front of mind. Following through on the possible outcomes , complete with likely predictions and acknowledgement of whether they’re negative or positive (or design yourself a decision tree, that lays out every possible consequence visually). Testing your intuition , by imagining a committed decision and then gauging the corresponding feeling it inspires in your gut. Taking the time you need , so long as it doesn’t become an overly indulgent distraction. Evaluating your decision , an after-the-fact exercise that engages a conscious inventory of the lessons learned. Coming to terms with your pick , always cognizant of the reality that no decision is