Skip to main content

How To Overcome Four Common Challenges To Become A Better Communicator


“Raising your game as a communicator is one of the best ways to make a difference in the world, but it takes courage to open up to others and invite others to open up to you” says Michelle D. Gladieux, author of the new book, Communicate With Courage: Taking Risks To Overcome The Four Hidden Challenges. 

Gladieux explains that those four hidden challenges and sneaky obstacles that can keep you from becoming the best communicator you can be are: 

  1. Hiding—Fear of exposing your supposed weaknesses.
  2. Defining—Putting too much stock into assumptions and being quick to judge.
  3. Rationalizing—Using “being realistic” to shield yourself from taking chances, engaging in conflict, or doing other scary but potentially rewarding actions.
  4. Settling—Stopping at “good enough” instead of aiming for something better in your interactions. 

According to Gladieux, these challenges all have something in common. They require taking risks—to reveal yourself, question your beliefs, take a leap of faith, or move out of your comfort zone. 

Fortunately, each book chapter includes a real-world practice called a Pro Move and an exercise, both carefully crafted to help you overcome hang-ups and take more joy in communicating. 

Effective and courageous communication requires self-knowledge, practice, and a desire to grow. It is a full-body, full-mind, and full-heart effort. This book is like having a caring, expert coach along with you for the journey. 

Today, Gladieux shares these insights with us: 

Question: Of the four obstacles, which one is typically the most challenging for communicators and why? 

Gladieux: The four hidden challenges are sneaky obstacles the keep us from becoming the best communicators we can be. In my teaching and coaching practice, I've named them Hiding (fear of exposing supposed or actual weaknesses), Defining (putting too much stock into our assumptions), Rationalizing (shielding ourselves from taking chances by focusing too much thinking on what might go wrong), and Settling (stopping at "good enough" rather than striving toward deeper, braver, more meaningful interactions). 

Which hidden challenge is most relevant and difficult to overcome for communicators will vary by person, since we all have unique upbringings, strengths, weaknesses, and experiences in the world. 

I've noticed that once I gain ground in seeing and coping with one challenge (whether I'm working on myself or helping a coaching client grow), another may rear its head and require attention to be overcome. It's also worth noting that we may find a challenge we believe we've conquered can emerge again as life tests us in new ways as communicators. 

Many coaching clients find that they need to give Rationalizing a rest before they can engage in potentially rewarding communication, because pessimism certainly has power to limit our opportunities as communicators in our personal and professional lives. 

And, if we're Settling, right out of the gate we know we won't be striving to reach our communication potential in any way. 

Readers can find Pro Moves and do-able exercises delivered with love and strategy throughout the book to help them take small steps toward facing all four hidden challenges and their communication fears. 

Question: At what point or stage in a person's career is your book most helpful and why? 

Gladieux: Communicate with Courage was built to help young adults through seniors make a difference in the world as communicators. 

As long as you're breathing and can speak and/or write, you can strive to summon courage to grow as a message sender and receiver. It's been wonderful to hear about people gifting this book to their 87-year-old grandmother and to their graduating high school senior. Throughout adulthood, we need to keep questioning our beliefs, sharing about ourselves in ways that can be helpful to others (as we help ourselves), and taking leaps of faith in communication.

 Michelle Gladieux

Michelle Gladieux is President of Gladieux Consulting, a Midwest-based team known for the design and presentation of seminars in communication and leadership topics around the U.S. 

She facilitates strategic planning and executive coaching for clients in diverse industries, in governments, at non-profits, and in academia. She has 18 years of collegiate teaching experience at three universities. She's worked as a Human Resources and Training Director in the cold storage, robotics, and construction industries and enjoys visiting conferences as a keynote speaker and workshop presenter. 

Thank you to the book’s publisher for sending me an advance copy of the book.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How To Be More Impactful Through Entrepreneurial Giving

    This Thanksgiving as you think about what you are grateful for, think, too, about how you can be more giving.   To help you discover a more giving you, read the new book, A Talent For Giving , by John Studzinski .   It introduces the meaning of entrepreneurial giving - a hands-on approach to philanthropy that harnesses skills, expertise, and resources. Through thought-provoking insights, A Talent for Giving offers a powerful new roadmap for impact as Studzinski shows how anyone, regardless of financial means, can become a force for change.   You do that by maximizing your Talent , Time , and Treasure and by embracing these values alongside others like Trust , Technology , and Trial , according to Studzinski.   “Giving is any act of kindness or generosity that recognizes and respects the dignity of another human being,” shares Studzinski. “It can be something very simple – a smile, or a hug or a few words. And on a larger scale, it’s giving your time,...

Don't Delay Tough Conversations With Your Employees

If you have an employee who needs to improve his/her performance don't delay the tough conversation with them. If you don't address the issue right now, the employee has little chance to improve, and you'll only get more frustrated. Most employees want to do a good job. Sometimes they  just  don't know they aren't performing up to the required standards. Waiting until the employee's annual performance appraisal to have the tough conversation is unhealthy for you and the employee. So, address the issue now. Sit down with your employee in a private setting. Look them in the eye. First, tell them what they do well. Thank them for that good work. Then, tell them where they need to improve. Be clear. Be precise. Ask them if they understand and ask them if they need any help from you on how to do a better job. Explain to them that your taking the time to have the tough conversation means you care about them. You want them to do better. You believe they can do better. ...

5 Elements Of Goal Setting

"The more specific you can be about your goal, the greater your level of success will be," explain authors  Tom Pandola  and  James W. Bird , in their book,  Light A Fire Under Your Business . "This is because once we have visualized something that doesn't yet exist, it causes our subconscious mind to make the decisions necessary to make that visualized goal a reality." The authors explain that all goals must have these  five elements : Goals must clarify a specific action or outcome. Goals must be measureable by being able to quantify the benefits of achieving them. Goals should be achievable with the resources available (or at least you should know that the necessary resources are in reserve and can be acquired). Goals must also be realistic for achieving based on your particular situation. Goals must also include the time period in which you want to achieve them. With a date or time period specified for completion, planning can be established in order for eva...

70 New Year's Resolutions For Leaders

  With 2026 fast approaching, it's a good time to identify your New Year's Resolutions for next year. To get you started, how about selecting one or more of the following 70 New Year's resolutions for leaders? Perhaps write down five to ten and then between now and January 1, think about which couple you want to work on during 2026. Don't micromanage Don't be a bottleneck Focus on outcomes, not minutiae Build trust with your colleagues before a crisis comes Assess your company's strengths and weaknesses at all times Conduct annual risk reviews Be courageous, quick and fair Talk more about values more than rules Reward how a performance is achieved and not only the performance Constantly challenge your team to do better Celebrate your employees' successes, not your own Err on the side of taking action Communicate clearly and often Be visible Eliminate the cause of a mistake View every problem as an opportunity to grow Summarize group consensus after each deci...

How To Build Great Work Relationships

Here is a book I wish was published back when I was early in my career. It’s called,  Bosses, Coworkers, and Building Great Work Relationships . It’s one of four books in the new  Harvard Business Review  ( HBR )  Work Smart Series .  The book includes adapted content from 20 articles that previously appeared on HBR.org.  “We probably spend more hours with our coworkers than with anyone else. So even if they’re not all perfect, it’s worth it to build connections that will provide you with support, help you network and learn, and keep your career moving forward,” shares HBR.  “This book helps readers make so-so work relationships better, keep the bad ones from bringing them down, and help them build lasting connections with incredible people.”  HBR adds that the book includes chapter takeaways and dozens of resources so that you can go beyond the book to engage in the media (video, audio, etc.) you learn from best.  As you read Bosses,  C...

Are You A Perceptive Listener?

"Perceptive listening requires you to be totally focused, completely mindful, and perceptive of the conversation -- about what is spoken and what remains unspoken," explains John Jantsch , author of the book, Duct Tape Selling . He adds, "Perceptive listening reveals things that a distracted or even mostly active conversation can't reveal." To be a perceptive listener , ensure you hear and interpret the words as they're said, and also consider what the person isn't saying. What they might really be thinking, and how they are acting as they speak.

The 14 Things Great Coaches Do

For those who may have missed this posting from earlier in the year, I am pleased to share again a guest post from  Garret Kramer  of  InnerSports LLC  about how to be a great coach: 14 Attributes of Great Coaches By Garret Kramer, Author of  Stillpower: Excellence with Ease in Sports and Life   There are many, many coaching manuals and books on the market today.   Unfortunately, virtually all of them provide an external blueprint or "positive" guide to successful coaching and leadership. Very few, however, point the coach inward to an intuitive understanding that he or she already possesses.   Below are fourteen examples of the inside-out coaching paradigm  revealed in  Stillpower .  Consider these attributes of great coaches for yourself; then see how they might apply to you, your team, classroom, company, or family.   1.  Great coaches think state of mind first; behavior (including "working...

29 People Who Taught Us Life Lessons In Courage, Integrity And Leadership

  The 29 profiles you will read in Robert L. Dilenschneider’s new book, Character , are about people who are exceptional exemplars of character. They’re inspirational because they used their abilities at their highest levels to work for causes they believed in. Because of character, they influenced the world for good.   The dictionary defines “character” as the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual, the distinctive nature of something, the quality of being individual in an interesting or unusual way, strength and originality in a person’s nature, and a person’s good reputation.   “But beyond these definitions, we know that character is manifested in leadership, innovation, resilience, change, courage, loyalty, breaking barriers, and more,” explains Robert (Bob), “Character drives the best traits in our society, such as honesty, integrity, leadership, and transparency, and it drives others to exhibit those qualities.”   Profiled in the book ar...

Quantum Marketing

“Marketing today is at the brink of unprecedented disruption”, explains,  Raja Rajamannar , author of the book,  Quantum Marketing . “An explosion of game-changing new technologies, data and cultural shifts will render traditional marketing frameworks and strategies ineffective, and turn the function upside down.”  Rajamannar’s book is all about the mastering the new marketing mindset for tomorrow’s consumers.  He takes you beyond product marketing, emotional marketing, digital marketing and mobile and social marketing, into what he terms quantum marketing .  You’ll learn how to : Replace advertising with better ways to efficiently engage consumers at scale. Hyper-personalize marketing with AI. Go virtual and immersive with everything from VR-AR product demos to gamification. Reach all five human senses, with Multi-Sensory Marketing and Sonic Branding. Invest in partnerships to capitalize on new opportunities beyond their immediate reach. Quantify impact with da...

Wellness Perks And Programs Popular Among Best Places To Work Companies

  Last month, the   Kansas City Business Journal   published its list of   2013 Best Places To Work Companies   in the Kansas City metro.  As you review the winning companies profiles (the publication's October 4, 2013 issue), you'll notice that wellness and fitness programs and perks are common among this year's winners.   For example: Health center   - Burns & McDonnell Subsidized fitness club memberships   - DEG; Ryan LLC Monthly massage therapist visits   - FishNet Security Inc. No-cost 15 fruit and vegetable "brain foods" every day   - Genesys Systems Integrator Fitness facility   - Argosy Casino Hotel & Spa; Henderson Engineers Inc.; Plattform Advertising Inc. Healthy snacks in general gathering rooms   - Tortoise Capital Advisors LLC Wellness and fitness events   - Lockton Cos., Kansas City Employee Benefits S tand-up workstations spread throughout the office   - Netsmart Technolo...