Skip to main content

How To Be More Courageous

 

“Fear creates the gap between who you are and who you can be. Courage closes it,” explains Margie Warrell, PhD, author of the new book, The Courage Gap: 5 Steps To Braver Action

“To clarify, closing your courage gap is not about 'de-risking' your life or sheltering from problems—natural and human created. Rather, it is about bringing the bravest version of yourself to every situation,” adds Dr. Warrell. 

That includes actively taking on rough problems, doing what is unpopular, facing storms head-on, and maybe even reshaping the broader landscape in the process.

Dr. Warrell empowers us to recognize that courage is a learnable skill accessible to everyone, regardless of how risk-averse, timid, or defensive we may be. 

Additionally, for leaders, The Courage Gap provides a guide to operationalize and scale the courage mindset across your team and organization to deepen trust, dismantle silos, foster innovation, accelerate learning, and unleash collective courage toward a more secure and rewarding future. 

This is not another book on why courage is important; it is a research-backed, step-by-step guide to teach us how to close the gap between thinking and doing, hesitation and action—the courage gap. 

“Closing your courage gap is not a short course but a life-long endeavor. It will stretch you in ways and humble you in others,” shares Dr. Warrell. 

Drawing on cutting-edge research woven together with stories that compel head and heart, The Courage Gap will help you bridge the think/do gap between what you’ve been doing and what you can do; between where you are and where you want to be—in your career, relationships, leadership, and life. 

More specifically, Dr. Warrell will help you develop your mastery in the two essential dimensions of courage

  1. Management of fear.
  2. Willingness to act in its presence, amid real or perceived risks

Further, as you read the book you will learn about the powerful 5-step roadmap to reprogram the self-protective patterns of thought and behavior that sabotage success to bring your bravest self to your biggest challenges and boldest vision. Those five steps are:

Intention: Focus on what you want, not what you fear. Your desire for a positive outcome must exceed your fear of a negative outcome. 

Belief: Rescript what’s keeping you stuck, stressed, or living too safely. Rewrite the self-protective stories magnifying the perception of risk and siphoning courage to act. 

Connection: Embody and breath in courage. Transform the psychology of fear to the physiology of courage, connecting to the power of your presence and to people who help you "walk taller."

Action: Step into discomfort. Practice the “one-brave-minute” rule, embracing "growing pains” to override your “inner wimp” (even the most heroic have one). 

Learning: Find the treasure when you trip. Forgive your fallibility and mine the lessons in every miss-step, struggle, and setback. 

Applying these five steps will:

  • Ignite passion and unlock the potential fear holds dormant.
  • Rewrite the scripts that have kept you stuck, stressed, and living too safely.
  • Reset your “nervous” system and embody courage in critical moments.
  • Transform discomfort as a cue to step forward and expand your bandwidth for bold action.
  • Reset your relationship to failure and make peace with the part of you that wimps out.

An additional piece of advice from Dr. Warrell is, “Be led by your values, not your emotions. When your values are clear, courage becomes easier.” 

Dr. Margie Warrell, Leadership Coach and Author

Dr. Warrell shares these additional insights with us: 

Question: In leadership or entrepreneurship, what are effective ways to demonstrate courage among those around you so that everyone on your team is more open to change? 

Dr. Margie Warrell

Be real about what challenges you

Courage takes vulnerability. One of the most powerful ways of demonstrating courage is to lower the “got it all together” masks we often wear as a leader or business owner. Lowering this mask is being real about what challenges us, where we’ve fallen down, and what sometimes keeps us from getting back up. 

People on our teams will play it safe unless they feel safe to do otherwise. By showing that you sometimes mess up, that you don’t always get it right, you make it safer for them to try things that may otherwise not. 

Learn something new and share your fumbling up the learning curve

The reason that we often resist taking on learning new skills is that we have to go through the phases of the learning curve that can be socially embarrassing and uncomfortable. It’s why people who haven’t learned to swim as kids don’t try to learn as adults—they have to flap around in the water like a 3-year-old. So, take on learning a new skill and share your experience of moving from conscious incompetence to conscious competence. 

Say Sorry

We all mess up. We all fall short of being as patient, organized, or calm as we’d like to be. When you do, own it and apologize to those around you. Not only do you win trust by being real and humble, but also you demonstrate a willingness to embrace your fallibility which, in turn, creates an opening for braver action. 

Share your discomfort

You cannot lead from your comfort zone. Share how you treat discomfort as a cue to move forward, not to retreat. It will help others follow suit. 

Question: What is one specific action that anyone can take to start closing the courage gapbetween who they are and who they want to betoday? 

Dr. Margie Warrell

Start where you are with the next decision you face. 

Ask yourself, “What would the bravest part of me do right now? “Then do that. It doesn’t matter how small or insignificant it is or how uncomfortable you feel. Just take action. Courage is a muscle. You have to put in the reps. When we practice courage in small ways it expands our capacity to take action amid our fears and the risks in larger ways. 

___

Dr. Margie Warrell (pronounced Mar-gee), is a five-time best-selling author, keynote speaker, leadership coach, and Forbes columnist. With twenty-five years of experience living and working around the world, she has dedicated her life to helping others overcome fear and unlock their potential. 

She is Senior Partner at Korn Ferry and Advisory Board member for the Forbes School of Business & Technology. 

Thank you to the book’s publisher for sending me an advance copy of the book.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Seven Ways To Stay Motivated

To learn how to stay motivated, read  High-Profit Prospecting , by  Mark Hunter . It's a powerful read that includes counterintuitive advice and cutting-edge best practices for sales prospecting in today's business world. Today, I share one of my favorite sections of the book where Hunter describes his  seven things motivated people do to stay motivated : Motivated people  ignore voices in their lives . These might be people in the office and friends who have bad attitudes. They're out there, and if you're not careful, they'll control you, too. Motivated people  associate with highly motivated people . Just as there are negative people in the world, there are also positive people. Your job is to make sure you spend as much time with the positive people as possible.  Motivated people simply  look for the positive in things . Positive people count it an honor to live each day, learn from others, and impact positively those they meet. Positive people take...

29 People Who Taught Us Life Lessons In Courage, Integrity And Leadership

  The 29 profiles you will read in Robert L. Dilenschneider’s new book, Character , are about people who are exceptional exemplars of character. They’re inspirational because they used their abilities at their highest levels to work for causes they believed in. Because of character, they influenced the world for good.   The dictionary defines “character” as the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual, the distinctive nature of something, the quality of being individual in an interesting or unusual way, strength and originality in a person’s nature, and a person’s good reputation.   “But beyond these definitions, we know that character is manifested in leadership, innovation, resilience, change, courage, loyalty, breaking barriers, and more,” explains Robert (Bob), “Character drives the best traits in our society, such as honesty, integrity, leadership, and transparency, and it drives others to exhibit those qualities.”   Profiled in the book ar...

Important Questions To Ask Your New Hires

  In  Paul Falcone ’s book,  75 Ways For Managers To Hire, Develop And Keep Great Employees , he recommends asking new employees the following questions 30, 60 and 90 days after they were hired:   30-Day One-on-One Follow-Up Questions Why do you think we selected you as an employee? What do you like about the job and the organization so far? What’s been going well? What are the highlights of your experiences so far? Why? Tell me what you don’t understand about your job and about our organization now that you’ve had a month to roll up your sleeves and get your hands dirty. Have you faced any unforeseen surprises since joining us that you weren’t expecting?   60-Day One-on-One Follow-Up Questions Do you have enough, too much or too little time to do your work? Do you have access to the appropriate tools and resources? Do you feel you have been sufficiently trained in all aspects of your job to perform at a high level? How do you see your job relating to the organi...

Looking Back: Best New Leadership Book Of 2016

Flashback to 2016... After reading nearly 30 new books about leadership this past year, my pick for  2016's best new leadership book  is,  Mastering the Challenges of Leading Change , by  H. James Dallas . Technically, the book came out in the fall of 2015, but gained its popularity and momentum in 2016, hence my selection as my 2016 pick. Virtually every business is undergoing change. And, one of the most difficult things for a leader to do is to successfully lead a change initiative. And, change is what most employees fear most. That's why, says Brown that on average nearly 75 percent of change initiatives fail. What's more... When the rate of external change exceeds the rate of internal change, the end is in sight. Fortunately, Brown has written what I consider to be one of the most straight-forward, practical and timely books on how to lead a transition through change effectively. H. James Dallas More specifically, Brown covers much more than tasks, timing and te...

Be A Visible Leader

If you are a manager in a small business or not so large department, it's probably easy for you to be visible to your employees and co-workers. If you manage a large business, department or  organization , you'll want to make a conscious effort to be visible. Don't spend your days behind closed doors or constantly in meetings. Walk around. Make conversation with your team members. It's important that you maintain  visibility  with your employees. That also means associating with employees at all levels. Don't limit your time for only your direct reports. The benefits for your employees are that they get to know you better and feel that you are more in tune with what's going on. The benefits to you are that you'll build a stronger rapport with your team, and you'll undoubtedly hear about good things and bad things through casual conversation that you would have missed if you had been less visible.

Leading Business Transformation That Lasts

David Shaner's compelling,  The Seven Arts of Change , shows business leaders that transforming a business only happens when each employee equates organizational change with the process of deep personal growth. "The bottom line is that, despite how technological and automated organizations have become, at their core they remain a collection of human energies that are merely being applied in an organized environment," explains Shaner.  "Resurrecting and guiding that human core of your organization is the secret to leading and sustaining change," he adds. Shaner pulls from his vast professional and personal experiences, including having been a member of the Olympic Valley USA Ski Team and a former Harvard University teacher, to lay out a seven-part "spiritual guide" for change: The Art of Preparation (Assessment) The Art of Compassion (Participation) The Art of Responsibility (Accountability) The Art of Relaxation (Clarity, Focus, Visibility)...

How To Create A Culture That Supports Workplace Wellness

In 2016, the Wellness Council of America named Lance Breger as one of the Top 50 Health Promotion Professionals in the U.S. . Today, Lance shares his recommendations for how a business leader can create a culture that supports workplace employee wellness . Lance Breger Question : What are two to three things a leader can do to create a culture of wellness at their workplace? Lance : Living   by example is the single very greatest thing a leader can do to create a culture of wellness. Be the change you want to see in the workplace. Even the small wellness efforts are noticed like bringing a water bottle to meetings, making good food choices, leaving the office on-time, unplugging on weekends, using a standing desk and taking the stairs.  Question : What else can a leader do to demonstrate he/she values wellness for their employees? Lance : A leader can name health and well-being as a core value of the company, department and even team. This can be posi...

Chick-fil-A Serves Up 11 Leaders On May 6

On May 6 , the quick-service chicken restaurant chain, Chick-fil-A will serve up more than chicken.  Because, that's the day when the chain's President and COO Dan Cathy brings together 10 influential leaders during a one-day leadership " Leadercast " available at hundreds of locations around the U.S. and overseas. "We desire to influence leaders at every level within an organziation. Whether you are leading a team of 2,000 or just yourself, the Chick-fil-A Leadercast is designed to help you use your voice to create positive change," explains the organization. I am a big fan of Chick-fil-A because of its customer service.  It is also known as a company that has built its success on core values and its focus on developing leaders .  I also like that employees respond with "my pleasure" instead of "no problem" when customers say "thank you." Chick-fil-A says leaders can express themselves with five voices (described below i...

Why Your Middle Managers Are So Important

The book,  Power To The Middle , shows how  managers  are the crucial link between a company’s ground floor and top brass. “Too often company leaders view middle managers in a negative light as expendable employees who can slow down productivity and overall strategy,” explain the book’s authors and McKinsey partners  Bill Schaninger ,  Bryan Hancock , and  Emily Field .  “However, new KcKinsey research reveals that this outdated perspective needs to change and that well-developed managers  are  the strategy that companies must prioritize to succeed today,” they add.  Most importantly, by the end of their book, the authors sum up their insights and provide a  playbook  that will help senior leaders let go of the command-and-control mindset that has hobbled their managers for so long.  The authors define middle managers as the people who are at least once removed from the front line and at least a layer below the senior lead...

The Top 20 Leadership Books: What To Give First To A New Manager

Eighteen months ago, I posted the question “ What’s The First Leadership Book You Would Give To a New Manager ?” within the discussion forum for the LinkedIn group Linked 2 Leadership . That question generated 603 comments and 690 recommendations.    Some people suggested more than one book.   Some during the course of the 18 months made the same book recommendations a couple times.   And, the group discussion continues to be one of the most active still today. In early November 2011, group member Len White graciously culled through the comments using his company’s Symphony Content Analysis Software that assists with the organization, analysis, and reporting of themes contained in text data. And here are the results : ·      412 different/unique books were recommended ·      The Top 20 recommended books, collectively, received 250 of the total recommendations ·      Two authors – S...